Monday, December 11, 2006

UTOPIA

Hi All,

Back after a long hiatus. September 6 reads the last update !!!
More shocked at my lack of posting. After umpteen promises of updation(in some cases revival) to many of my good friends, I am here finally. (Hopefully my lethargy doesn't continue).

I tried to come back with a bang,
But somewhere missed, and developed a guilty pang,
A heart yearning to write,
Alas, lethargy won over creative light.
So where was I when I wanted to fulfill my heart's desire,
Where did it disappear to, the fire?
And what's my excuse now that I am back,
How am I to escape this genteel sack ?

Happened to come across many a thing,
At times gave a feel that I had sprouted wings,
Of flying high, of feeling glad,
At times slightly sad,
Of learning something of use,
With never ending books making me muse,
Of happiness unadulterated and pure,
with slighting prob's, though with a cure.
With good work to keep my time,
What other work could be more prime ?
I asked myself again and again was this the cause,
And knew by instinct this wasn't the reason for the loss.

Family and work are two halves,
Leaving no quarter or otherwise for anything else,
Considered it a luxury
To take time off to gratify one's own being,
But the minutes before sleep,
During the quiet acceptance of a necessity I let go,
Deciding many a times that procrastination is my greatest foe,
I shed aside a promise I made to myself,
To post this post before I turn into a work/house-elf.

This is my state of UTOPIA I feel,
Transitory it maybe,I make another "me-myself" promise-deal,
Who said promises are meant to be broken ?
Not while a hope remains open.

Hmmm so thats how it goes.. This is what will happen when one happen's to read Vikram Seth :) Love his book "A Suitable Boy", which never seem to end.
And at last about to finish it, which again adds to my euphoria.
Hopefully will be back soon.

CIAO and CIAO soon.

Wednesday, September 06, 2006

The PeRfEcT Moon

Hi All,

When I was a kid, I used to visit my parents during summer vacation.( I lived with my grandparents). Most of the nights we would sleep under the stars in a wide open space, , which people would normally refer by the term balcony, but which we used to call "Bail". Don't know the origins of the name, but we referred it that way( Still do). Might be because it helped us escape the oven like interior.

I would gaze at the billion stars, trying unsuccessfully to count them. On many occasions (almost every night) would point the constellations to my mom. The Great bear, also called as Ursa Major, The ursa Minor, the Orion, also called the Hunter and so on...Point out the formation of clouds and name them. (Cumulus Nimbus etc)
Used to keep rattling names till she dozed off to sleep.
Of all the times I remember only a crescent moon. (Not a full moon, blooming in its richness, but a crescent moon glorious even in its waning state)

The PeRfEcT moon,
The perfect moon becomes perfect only to become imperfect.
It reaches the highest point only to come down again.
The pinnacle is attained to touch ground zero once more.
Its is adored only to cursed later.


Its the same single moon.
Only the perception of people viewing the moon changes.
The moon struggles, lives through the month to attain full glory. But that moment of glory is transient, vanishes the next day. And it doesn't quit. Doesn't quit through its period of decline.
Rises , and rises once more to become its glorious self.


Humans try to attain perfection, but if perfection is relative, perfection is just a perception of perfection and not really perfection.
There can exist nothing that is perfect, its the limitation of humans to look beyond the obvious, and therefore conceptualize perfection, while it can never exist.
The path that we take to attain the so called perfection is more important, and more vital than the so called perfection itself.


The pinnacle is transitory, but the path is permanent.
Someone else can take your glory, but never your hardwork.
Others can overshadow you, but can never prevent you from experiencing your life.
All that really matters is not whether or when we succeed, but the choices that we make, and the choices that we never give up.
What we make our life in the end hardly matters, but the road we trudged upon to make our life is what matters.

The perfect moon is more perfect and more loved when its just a crescent,
We are more human with our faults, when we try to limit our faults and become a better person.
Never ever judge yourself.
Accept you as you are, and never let go, till you become what you want to become, and still continue beyond, irrespective of the cycles of change. Extreme darkness can only lead to light.


CIAO.


Monday, September 04, 2006

Worldometer

Hi all,

One of my friends sent me this link. Worldometers Was really humbled to realise how insignificant we all are compared to the universe we all are.
Made me to realise we could be making some difference somewhere to someone. No life is insignificant when it has got a caring heart that beats for it .

Thought of penning a few words..
Small maybe our quest,
More maybe the time we invest,
But for those who trust,
We have to be our very best.


Hmmm and got this cute little gif image in a forward. Thought of sharing it too.. :)

Till my next post...

CIAO.


Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Independence day special

Hi All,

A lazy afternoon, I keep shifting channels in the hope that I would come across something good to watch. No luck :(
But found something "interesting". Independence day special. In all the channels including good old Doordharsan.

Back in school we used to have independence day celebrations with parades, inspiring speeches about the leaders in different languages ( Tamil, English, Hindi) , few dances and of course patriotic songs by the choir. The practices for the same would start a fortnight back. And the auditions for the speeches will be held three days before the event. By which time the whole school would be aware( and in most cases would have witnessed) every single event that was supposed to take place.

On the day of the event other than the above mentioned , there would of course be speeches made by the Principal( which used to drag for hours) and by the Chairman( we would hear muffled sounds instead of a speech) and at the end, few pretty senior girls would called discreetly by staff, to distribute chocolates to all students. At the end of national anthem everyone would push each other to be the first in the queue.

Even after so many years the chocolate craze hasn't subsided :) (In fact become worse). But somehow those two small pieces of chocolate seem more significant than any amount of Dairymilk or Temptations.
After that there would of course be "Roja" film to look forward in Doordharsan. Year after year, the cycle remained the same.

i.e until recently ...
All the channels bid against each other to telecast "India tolaikatchigalil mudhal muraiyaga" films. And yeah if the hero of the film happens to cast in the role of an army officer, its a patriotic movie. Even if the movie's vulgar, it is considered patriotic. Telecast some show where some dumb actor talks about country , about the matyr's, about patriotism blah blah..
Why is there so much dearth of ideas. If they can't engage people without films and actors then please get back to your mega-serial routine. Who really cares what some XYZ person thinks, if the same XYZ person is contributing nothing productive for the nation , other than lousy entertainment ?

I am not against films. I love films. Just happen to consider that it is such a shame, that we are so accustomed to celebrating everything , without realizing the full intent of it. Be it diwali, dusshera or Independence day . Sending forwards wishing independence and convincing ourselves that our part is more than accomplished is such a shame . And I regret that even I am part of it and that I do the same. I can't escape it .

Everyday I see orphaned ( maybe not ) kids in the train dancing , singing aloud songs, begging for alms, playing tricks with the hoops. It is distressing to see that some actually encourage it. At the end of the day, whatever they earn (yes earn) goes to somebody else.
I don't know whether refraining from donating alms helps them.
But I do know that contributing only worsens their sad state of affairs.

When they grow up, they grow up embittered. Embittered by the fact that there's so much disparity in society, embittered by the fact that fate was cruel to them. Who wouldn't. We whine when the food isn't good to our taste buds. They whine because they have no food. We worry when our clothes become dirty. They have no clothes to worry about. We sit and complain about the air condition not functioning properly, when they don't have a shelter to reside .

Even I do all the above mentioned and I am not proud about it. All of us could so easily have been one amongst the kid on the roads. We are lucky that we can read this, while they might not even be aware that such things are being written about them.
At the same time, I am just wondering... They have a life. They too have the same emotions, who am I to pass a judgement that they aren't happy. They might be, except that it is not the kind of happiness that we usually relate to.

Is there a solution ?
For every single kid adopted by some organizations there are ten on the streets, suffering the same fate. Can't we do anything other than feeling for the kids ?
There's one thing we really could do . And which wouldn't require so much of an effort. We can visit the homeless kids sometime and talk to them. They come to you so openly without any inhibitions. They want to held;to be cuddled;to be loved.
Else, we can make contribution for a child's future.
Visit
CRY.

As their motto goes

CRY... The initials stand for Child Relief and You. In spirit, it stands for hope, for possibilities, for the conviction that collective action by individuals and organizations can restore India's underprivileged children the rights that are owed to them.

And it is not just one organization. Hundreds of other organizations too do the same. Worth mentioning is the fact that my company too has an organization which doesn't stop with contributions alone. It reaches out to the kids by making them learn English and math taken by its members.

We can make a huge difference. If only , if only we had an heart. After all you spend for your cable more..

Make a difference, Be a proud Indian.

CIAO

Sunday, July 23, 2006

Imsai Arasan 23aam Pulikesi

Hi All,

The title says it all. Saw the movie yesterday.
Liked it a lot. The chief reason being, Vadivelu.
An amazing actor. Real fun to see him with the curved up mustache.
The whole movie is just mindless and senseless humor.
For people who expect movies to be logical, better avoid this one.
The movie's strength lies in its irrationality and illogicity ( For those who are wondering whether illogicity is a valid and established word, I checked it. It is :)).
Whatever the critics might say, worth the money you pay for a ticket.
Though it isn't as funny as one would like it to be, the movie still entertains.




The plot is very simple, twins are separated during birth by the scheming back - stabbing
Raja-Guru ( Chief- Tutor). While one ( the 23rd Pulikesi becomes a puppet and a pawn in the hands of the Raja-Guru , the other twin, Ukkrabuddhan goes on to become a great warrior ( who later becomes the savior)

Meanwhile the innocent Pulikesi is brain washed to extend full support to the British regime in India. Ukkrabuddhan saves the day, by the age old double-act. By swapping places with his twin, defeats the British and reforms the Raja-Guru . All live happily ever after.

The movie is simple and straight forward.It doesn't carry stupid sentiments and is a welcome change. A decent movie which can be watched by anyone. After so long a family entertainer in its truest sense. The movie has its own setbacks too , like for instance the music could have been better. The plot could have been made lot funnier . But if we don't encourage such movies right now, then there might come a time, when only "Dada"type movies are produced.
This may not be the best effort, but nevertheless it is undoubtedly a good effort.
Can definitely be watched once. :)

CIAO.

Moody, touchy and irritable

Hi All,

Feeling moody as I post this.

I put my trust in you,
Pushed as far as I can go,
For all this,
There's only one thing
You should know..
I tried so hard and got this far,
In the end, it doesn't even matter.

My brother keeps telling me, that whenever he's down, he listens to this particular song of Linkin Park's.
And for the first time, I can't argue with him .:)
So true.. So very true. Just play the song with max volume. It helps. It really does.

CIAO.

Monday, July 03, 2006

New "old" template

Hi All,

First, feels nice to back in my turf. ( He he :) Nice to have good things beside you ).
Since I changed back to my old template, thought of writing about it.



Disclaimer : All statements that follow are exaggerated and intended only to make others smile :) (Yeah you can laugh or cry. Depends on you much you can tolerate mokkai's;)
Note: Mokkai is a word in Tamil meaning -Superlative usage of "blaydu". Jokes that literally kills or capable or causing extensive damage. Source - Wikipedia )

Made a blunder in changing the template.
Didn't feel like making a post after the change.
Felt alienated(???) in my OWN blog (!!!).
It defeated the whole purpose of blogging for me( Which is to make it as personal as possible . To find my own space, my own identity )

Learnt some important life lessons (???) from this incident.

1) Never go for something that looks good on others. It would not suit you in most cases. Things that work for others does not always work for you. The other template looked professional, nice and is obviously a better choice. But it didn't suit me at all. For the simple reason my blog is not professional. Its personal, the space for my over flowing thoughts ( yeah that's in the header).
Go for only those things that suit you.

2) Never feel ashamed to turn back , once you made a blunder. Its never right to live with a wrong. Once you correct yourself,it gives you immense satisfaction.


3) Always embrace the good things that shaped you into who you are now .In my case it was my blog.


4) Errr.... Don't have a fourth life lesson to write about :)

Feeling light and bright .

Till my next post.

CIAO.



Sunday, June 25, 2006

New Template

Hi All,

He He.. :) Changed my template. The old template wasn't as neat as this.
Thanks Srini.

CIAO.

Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Need for recognition

Hi All,

The topic itself is self-explanatory. Everyone of us like to be appreciated, be it a simple word of appreciation or a grand occasion in our honor. We love to be appreciated.

Which is why most companies, try to boost employee morale by having contests such Anthakshari, Dumb Charades or in my case "The best looking workstation hunt " :)
Being so particular and choosy about the dresses and items I choose, thought .. why not ? I convinced myself thinking that i have enough aesthetic sense to decorate my workstation :)

Registered my name at the last day of nominations .
And instantly regretted the decision. On a floor of 400 ,how does it look if one (only one)stay late so that she can decorate( ???????? ) her workstation. People were highly amused at the stuff , rather the range of articles I brought from home. They kept shooting glances at my direction, wondering what I was upto. On top of that my good friends were kalachifying ( kalachifying is word in Tamil. Meaning to tease in a funny manner which generally doesn't hurt) at my interest. I had second thoughts to remove all that I made and go home. But some part of me held on. ( The truth was, having come this far, I didn't wanna turn back. Also didn't wanna lose face by being a spoil sport)
Just thought, what the heck (!!!) let me participate.

The next morning I got early so that I can buy flowers to place inside a crystal bowl. ( Made the flowers to float inside the bowl ) But Murphy's law proved true . Once more :) Came late to office. The moment I entered office, was astonished, happy , overjoyed and dismayed at the same time. (In the same order) Astonished because there were others like me, who gone to even more lengths for decoration :) Happy because of the same. And dismayed too because of the same .:)
I had competition :(((

But then the entire Iobi-Web came to my rescue.
They helped me by contributing all the articles they possessed , right from Lakshmi Ma'am 's Vinayagar(s), to Marina's scented candles (hmm if I am to mention all of her contribution , it will take the entire space ), Raja's watch to Seshadri's mobile stand, Srini's calendar and greeting card, to Sesh's candle holder(s), and of course Sam's elephant and angel to Asheed's and Rajesh's pens.Everybody pitched in and contributed whatever they had :) Felt so good to have people helping me out :)
And above all my lead Wudali's awesome handwork. He made football(s), an ink-pot, a gift box, all out of thin paper. So deft with paper :) It caught everyone's attention and is worth a special mention :)

Then came the make-shift ideas, tied a bow around the gift-box made by my lead, the letter box made out of a poster. The collage of my school photos . The last minute adjustments and speech preparation. He he. It was awesome. Definitely one of the best day at Verizon.

Time for the judges
Two judges came and asked me the routine questions. What was the idea behind this ? Was this made by you ? How many items here, do you have on a regular basis ? Does having these things beside you help you to relax ?
Answered all questions truthfully. Didn't feel like lying. :)

The moment of truth.
After hours of waiting for the results, during which time, all the parvaialargals( the spectators) curiosity as to whether I won a prize could not be sustained.
Decided no point in waiting .. Let me go and have some snacks :) While I was in the cafeteria, one of my friends called up, and told that I got SPECIAL ACCOLADES in the Best Looking workstation hunt :) the my instant reaction was who won the first ( All along , ten eager faces were waiting near me, the faces expectant because of the call I received ) And yeah , I mentioned all three (Un-Intentionally, of course) winners without revealing that won a special prize.

Then I struck me. I did win. Even if its a special prize. On hearing it my friends broke into an instantaneous applause .:) I was really really happy :)

And hence the title.

As a blogger , the need for recognition is satisfied by the a single line comment .
As a poet, when the beauty of our words is appreciated.
As a programmer, when our code executes without any "object reference not set" kinda errors.
As a teacher , when we are able to inspire,
As a friend , when we are trusted and confided with,
As a philosopher, when the thought process is appreciated,
As a musician , when our sounds enthrall ,
As an artist, when our art work is beyond boundaries,
As a kid, when the innocent look places a smile on the lips of others,
As a inventor, when inventions rock the world,
As a human, when we live and let live :)

( There I go again :) Sentimental fool :) )

This post is dedicated to all those who helped me, encouraged me. It takes more than a good heart to let a person step forward when he took the only first step.
THANKS A LOT :) For the encouraging words and act.

CIAO :)






Sunday, June 18, 2006

Sounds

Hi All,

I am posting this in the middle of night, well over 1 AM (!!!!). Read an article, and just loved it.
Wanted to share it with all.

Wait a minute, finish this article before you click to view the other (!!!)

Ever wondered how sounds are produced ?
Ever wondered why we are able to hear only certain sounds and not others ?( Its because the human ear is capable of hearing only frequencies in the range of 20Hz to 20 kHz. Frequency is nothing but the number of cycles per second, or the number of repetitions per second)

Just struck by one thought..
I have heard many saying, "vaai irukkunnradukaga, enna venna pesalama? "
By nature, human ear can hear only certain frequencies.. ( a limitation)
by nature the eye can see only till the LOS (Line of Sight -again a limitation)
Whereas we can speak anything as long as we learn the language. There aren't any natural limitations.( Hmm one can ask whether we can produce sounds in the range outside of 20Hz to 20khz? Dunno the answer to that. But even if we do make it, we sure can't hear it :D )
Why is it so ? Perhaps is it to see how much of a self control we have over ourselves ?
Or perhaps whoever/whatever created us wanted us to find out for ourselves. ( Well the answer to this question of the universe , the life and everything is 42. ( Source- HitchHiker's Guide to galaxy, And the question to the answer- find out for yourself :D)

Don't wanna continue further with this mad talk. Here's the link.
Sounds. Hope you love it as much as I did :)

Ciao

Wednesday, June 14, 2006

Long time

Hi All,

Its been long since I posted. Infact don't find anything to make a post on, unless you are interested to read about the astronomical hike of gold rates or a detailed account of the most boring book I have ever read, or if you are remotely interested in one of mokkai's, do leave your comment . Will write about those if I am totally jobless or totally .....huh, some things are better not said.

The truth is, two of my good friends are getting married by the end of the year, and I wish them all the very best . They will shine wherever they go. (Hope they don't read this). Its a huge commitment and responsibility. Glad they made the right choices at the right time.

On a different note, listening to Paartha mudhal naale from Vettaiyaadu Vilaiyaadu.
Amazing song, beautiful lyrics. Hope the visual doesn't disappoint like Vaseegara. Thamarai is one very gifted lyricist. She captures the dreams & fantasies , life & love so poetically. All I can do is sit and wonder , be amazed at the similies and metaphors she draws in her songs.

Sample- Un alaadi anbinil nanaidapin ninaidapin naanum mazhaiyanen.
Meaning..
From the moment I got drenched in your endless love, even I became rain. AWESOME. BEAUTIFUL. Feel unworthy to even praise such brilliance.

On another different note, working on what I was good at few years back. Gives immense satisfaction.Will write about it that , once its all over and done. Might come as a surprise ( or shock) to many. :) Gotto go now. Other commitments demand attention :(.
Will post my next soon.
Till my next post...

CIAO

Sunday, May 28, 2006

Shruti meets Monkeys

Hi All,
Disclaimer :
All characters in this story are entirely my imagination , and bears resemblance only to me (In certain cases to few people whom I know ) . Any incident that resembles something else is purely co-incidental)

Before I start , few clarifications about SHRUTI.
Shruti is not a super hero,
Shruti is not a guardian angel,
Shruti is not a Joan of Arc,
Shruti is just a normal girl unique in her own way.
Now that the disclaimers and clarifications are out, OVER TO SHRUTI.
It was a warm summer day. Summer in Madras can be unbearable, especially if there are six more souls sharing the same space. In this case, the six being, Shruti's grandparents and her two elder brothers, Shashank( alias Sashi ) and Santosh, and her thatha's Sister and Brother ( Tamil for grandpa).

Santhosh, the eldest had nicknamed thatha's sis as Inni. The name had no meaning, it was one of those mazhalai mozhigal which everyone adores. The name stuck and even the relatives started calling her as Inni. As it so happens, after few years everyone forgot her real name, and by the time Shruti was born ( after 4 and 1/2 years) she knew her to be Inni.
Similarly Santosh coined the term Othatha for grandpa's brother. Othatha was very fond of Santosh , and loved him as his own grandson.

The scorching heat burns everything that comes out in the open. Even the birds which swoop and soar , seemed quiet. But nothing not even the blazing sun could hold Shruti from playing outside. Her quest was simple. If her brothers can play in the sun, so can she.
She always made it a point to do what all they are capable , and thus ended up being a tomboy in her early years.
It was weekend, therefore no school. And it was her parent's visiting day .
Every weekend her parents visited , though they lived only a kilometer away. All three wandered near the gate every few seconds for the sound of footsteps. After an hour's impatient wait, they heard it.

Ammmmmma Shruti started screaming at the top of her voice, those standing nearby souls have thought her vocal chord might snap, but they were also used to this routine. She went to the gate to open the main doors. When she opened, instead of her parents, there were three monkeys on top of the mango tree, plucking and throwing mangoes at Sashi.
Mesmerized , Shruti could hardly take her eyes of the monkeys. She hadn't seen one, all her life and was fascinated too see it. When the monkey turned to face her she realized that, a baby monkey was holding its mamma's tummy. Shruti was oddly reminded of herself , she pushed these thoughts aside and continued to stare at her.
By this time Sashi's screams had awoken granny , who had retired for the afternoon nap. She came out and saw what was the source of all commotions, and shied the monkeys away.
Patti ada thorathada, paavum, adu veyila enga pogum. ( Granny don't shoo them away, where will it go in this heat ? ) questioned Santosh.
Aaama, inda madiri paavum partha un sapada adu eduthukum replied Granny.
( If you pity it, then your share of food will go the monkeys)
This thought seemed to terrify Santosh , who was a sappattu piriyan, and thus fell silent. But none, not even the crying Sashi would stop staring at the monkeys. To their delight and fear, the monkeys were staring at these three. The usual noise that was routine during Sundays , was missing. Not even when Amma turned up, did the three leave their posts. Fed up of calling them inside , granny started serve the meal outside.
And suddenly it happened, halfway through a mouthful , Sashi exclaimed,
Patti adunga jump panradungo, inga poguthu ? Poga venanumnu sollu.
Thatha was secretly glad to get rid of this nuisances. He preferred a disciplined life, but was open at the same time had hoped mapillai sir( Shruti's appa) would have called the officials, but mapillai sir was busy trying to draw attention of the kids.
Thatha's hope was in vain, because the monkeys promptly re-appeared in the backyard, where there were more trees and thus less hot. The three kids were delighted to see the monkeys again.
Inni , on noting all the commotion quipped, moonu kurangu, innum moonu kuranga parkaradungo. ( Three monkeys are seeing three other monkeys ) Othatha guffawed on hearing this.
Patti who was always wary of Inni said, kuzhaindagala appadi solladel Paavum nallikki thiruppi schoolukku poganum Avalavu books thookitu vera.
Meanwhile , the three monkeys seemed bored of staring at three kids, especially since, they seemed to be doing nothing other than staring back at them. Soon they fell asleep.
Atlast Patti persuaded them to come inside, and the three realizing that the monkeys wouldn't be awake so soon, decided to take a nap themselves.
After few hours of blissful silence, Shruti's ear- shattering scream woke everyone.
Kannum, adungala kaanum. Appovae sonnen thoonga mattennu, ippo parthiya, adunga poiduchu. Seeing this Santosh and Sashi joined the hue and cry.
Po, inime naanga yaarum un kooda pesa mattom, they chorused .
Patti tried to pacify them, neenga samatha irundeengana naan ungalukku ravaladdu senju tharuven. All three became quiet, because all three loved to eat Patti's special RavaLaddu.
Thatha was glad. He had wanted mapillai sir to make the call, but since mapillai sir, made no signs of calling, thaytha himself had alerted the Zoo officials. They promptly came and whisked the monkeys away.
By night time, all three kids bid their goodbyes to mom and dad,troubled granny to tell them a story ,and went to sleep.
That's the first part. Hope you all like it.
Be sure to give your feedback in the comments section.
Time for me to sleep.
CIAO.

Thursday, May 18, 2006

Thanks

Hi All,

As the title suggests this is Thank You post to
Vadivel.
For those who don't know about him, (Non-Verizonites) he is a senior analyst, in my company.
Go through his blog, you'll know why he's one the most respected in my organization.

I remember the day, when he sent a mail to all of us, asking us to go through his blog in the ITWB site. :) He had mentioned in the mail, he feels honoured that Shadman Zafar , SVP ,( I hope I have got the person right) took time to go through his blog and comment.
I couldn't help but draw similarities here :)
It feels the same way to have guys like
Vadivel, Deepak, Ramesh go through my blog. (Especially since, I have been doing non-techie posts, most of them being silly) .
Though we( Srini, Vicky, and me) are just fresher's, he was magnanimous to make a post about us My Buddies are blogging.

Thanks a LOT. It means a lot to all of us. Felt good to read about ourselves from a senior person point of view.

P.S. Some more Iobi-Web fresher's are blogging ( Sethu, Vasanth, Seshadri, Ashutosh) Think I have mentioned all people whom I know.
If I have missed to mention someone, pardon me..

Till my next post..
CIAO

Sunday, May 14, 2006

Coming Next- Shruti

Hi all,

Keep watching this space, for Shruti, The Kid around the corner.
She's six, smart , cute and adorable.
Planning to write a series of incidents , about Shruti.
( Shruti, is a figment of my imagination, close to me and reflects me )
I am going to relive my childhood, through the adventures of SHRUTI.

She is that part of me which was always waiting to happen.
She is that part of me , that never was, but always there.
She is my break out area.


Coming Soon.
Till my next post...
CIAO.

Thursday, May 11, 2006

Life and Death

Hi All,

One simple question..

How can we die ? What are the different ways to die ?

The replies come out spontaneously.

Hanging by the rope (ah- gruesome and bad),
Consuming poison (slow and painful, unless its cyanide),
Getting Heart attacks ( multiple ones, you are a goner),
Jumping into deep sea. ( If sea is not accessible, then probably the old, rotten well in the backyard would suffice)
Accidents ( sure way of a rendezvous with Yema-Darma Raja)

Simple isn't it.

Another simple question.

How do we live ? What are the different ways to live ?

Not so simple , isn't it ?

The normal person says,

"What an absurd question. We live. We exist, therefore we live.
How can there be different ways of living. Do you mean work and lifestyle ? Don't confuse yourself and concentrate on the bigger things in life"

And I ask .. "What more bigger or important than LIFE ?"

Says the cynic,

"Life's is, but a journey towards death. All things perish.

Life's wretched ,
A wretched life is meaningless ,
A meaningless life amounts to nothing,
And therefore life itself is nothing.
Therefore going by the premise, life's an illusion, which dreamers chase wantonly. "

And I ask,
Isn't your own wretched life making you to jump to conclusions ? Isn't the fact that others are happy because they are simple, the foremost of your worries ? Don't you at least get some insane pleasure watching others suffer (This is a question only to the cynics and misanthropists. )
In that case, how can you claim that you aren't happy, at least once ?

Says the scientist ,

"biologically, as long as heart beats ,and human body is capable at least one of the six senses, we live".

And I ask,
In that case, even batteries live. They exist , and they expire. (We have rechargeble batteries now, so someday can we bring back the dead ?)

Says the philosopher,

"Thought provoking question. Various theories can be put forward, with each theory subject to different interpretations. It is not simple , otherwise why would it elude meaning for so long? Life's a continuum. If its to die, then why do we have to live ?
If it is to exist physically , why do we feel .
Why do we have emotions ?
Life's better if unanswered, because years will be spent in knowing one's own self. Then by the time we understand life, we would be nearing death."

And what do I say to the philosopher ?
I say nothing.

And what do I say about Life ?

Life's everything. A bit of all of the above. Life's a continuum. Our life doesn't end with us. We spread the wisdom,knowledge,experience and happiness to the next generation.

Life's one BIG bundle. A BIG bundle of emotions.
Care, jealousy, love, lust, agony, ecstasy, sight-seeings, fear, anger, affection, depression, hatred,happiness, loneliness EVERYTHING.

Everyone, will undergo all these emotions, some in abundance, some in trivia. We may pretend that it doesn't exist, we may shun it, we may overlook it, we may feel scared to reveal the nature of ourselves, but yes, they exist. This is life to me.
Experiencing pain and happiness, knowing that no day is alike, awaiting a brand new day, and a brand new beginning , everyday.
Firmly believe in the theory of relativity. Nothing is absolute.
Hatred exists only because love does.
Satan exists only because God does.
Lies exist only because of truth does.
But life ? If I go by the same premise, Life exists only because death does.
So if death kills our body, perishes our soul, then to live implies to CHERISH our soul, to love our existence, knowing that we will never get back this moment.
What we did or didn't do this moment, cannot be reverted .
But still we live, and as long as we exist, we owe ourselves the happiness of existence.
Never letting our spirits die( He he, one mokkai, when we die, we become spirits).
To get a LIFE in short.

To end, I quote one of my favourite quotation,

Life,

A little pain, a little pleasure,
A little heaping up of treasure,
Then no more gazing upon the sun,
All things must end that have begun.

CIAO.

P.S. This post has no connection with the earlier one.

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Life :)

Hi All,

Read a post by Swami about the meaning of life. Fascinated ( pun intended) by it.
Made me to ponder, the meaning of life, love , existence.

But now is not the time . Everything will happen when it has to happen. I am not in the mood to write a deep philosophical (???) post on what life's all about.
For the simple reason, I am not in one of those moods.

The IRONY..
The time when I am deep in thought, I don't get to make a post.
And the time when I post, I am not deep in thought.
Simply because, blogging makes me light hearted( sometimes light headed too :))

But will definitely write on this one. Been thinking about life for a long time .
Have no clue as to what it is all about.
Nobody can give an explanation as to what life is , simply because life in "their" viewpoint, is "their" life.. Not mine. So it can never explain my life, satisfactorily. The basics are common though.

Tried to understand me as a person, but not able to do so completely. Believe that the moment anyone realizes the purpose of their life, they cease to live. In the sense that life carries meaning, only when its a mystery. So prefer learning about myself everyday, in the small gestures,in stupid quarrels,in the times of reflection during the quite unhurried walks to the bus stop, in the hours of thought,while lying on the bed wide awake pondering the deeper purpose of my existence .

But wondering what am I doing by making this post.
About life........ hmmm will write later.
Sleep takes priority (12.30 AM) right now.

NEW ADDITION : Going to write about some fascinating (pun not intended) people I meet everyday. It could be you..Watch out. A small paragraph perhaps..
(No need to fear. I won't mention names, as always).You are free to guess the identity of the person, but it will never be revealed in this blog space .

The first one..
This person, is intelligent, sharp, silly, weird .
No wind can stop this person , and no wind can start too:)
Lazy to the core, when she wants to be lazy, but burns midnight oil when she wants to work.
Likes to live only by her rules, but gets confused somewhere in between .
Loyal to those, who can win her affection ,(even things that can win her affection)
But sometimes prejudiced because of the above reason.
Has certain disregard for things that can be disregarded, and confuses in categorizing those things. Cannot stand hypocrites and rumor mongers.

Unique thing about her---Her SELF , and her independance. Has too much of it, to let it be known :)

Till my next post ..
CAIO.

Friday, April 21, 2006

First Day @ Office

Hi All,
Celebrated my first day at my new work place.
Its AWESOME. I have no other words for it. Loved it the moment I set my eyes on it.
Its huge, (huge is an understatement. Gigantic X colossal is closer to describing it)

Loved it, inspite of the fact that I have to commute farther everyday.
Loved it, inspite of the fact that only few floors are complete.
Loved it, inspite of the fact that construction is still going on.
Loved it ,inspite of the fact that there's dust and debris all around. (Not inside the floor)
Loved it, inspite of the fact that there are mosquitoes.
Loved it, inspite of the fact that there's no privacy.
Loved it, inspite of the fact that I am unable to adjust my keyboard holder.
Loved it, inspite of the fact that place is cold. (Actually I like the cooling system. As my friend,aptly put it,the AC effect is something one has to feel on his/her own)
Loved it, because my FRIENDS are gonna be here in less than a month :)
( Tch, tch, I am getting emotional )

All that apart, found it neat, elegant & posh.
Though it was official and professional looking, it had an openness about it.
Don't know why I am so fascinated with the place. Considering the fact (huh too many facts in a single post) many my friends seemed to think otherwise.

Before i end, about the surprise event.....
Thanks to Vettiboss and his brilliant scheme, celebrated my friend's birthday in the most unusual way . We made him hunt for his "gift".

Vetaiyadhu , vilaiyadhu.
We initially gave him a clue, which if he decoded correctly would reveal the name of the person he should approach to get the next clue and so on.I missed seeing the fun in action. But heard first hand account of what happened.

I am not gonna write about it in detail as I promised earlier.
It would be unfair to the Vettiboss , the person behind the whole scheme, if I make that post.
So expecting him to post about the event in detail .


Till my next post...
CIAO.

Thursday, April 20, 2006

Last Day @ Office

Hi All,

Keep watching this space for a detailed account about the big event that's going to happen tomorrow.
Lots of surprises planned for someone dear to all of my colleagues (Hope he doesn't read this before tomorrow. Else, I will be killed for spoilers :))





Big day tomorrow ..So much to look forward to !!!
Change of work place, friend's birthday , THE SURPRISE EVENT)

Really excited about it. Listening right now to Ayutha Ezhuthu---Amazing songs. My personal favourite being Yakkai Thiri. Stunning song (just love the part where the singer sings only the swaras.) One of my all time favourites.

The song seems to echo my mood right now. Felt like making this post.



CIAO.

Thursday, April 13, 2006

Mega Serials

Hi All,

Wanted to make this post for a long time. But could make it only now :) Dunno whether I would complete this post. Its boring to "write" about it. Can't believe how people have patience to watch 15 + (!!!)serials a day. i.e. Without considering the ones who do multi-tasking with their little remote controls in hand.(Poor remote Controls). Flipping channels to watch two or more (!!!) serials at the same time.

Mega serials have become part of our life , so much that even meal times depend on the serial timings. All mega serials follow the same pattern., Scheming women who betray their "best friend" by stealing her husband. ALL serials have similar stories. I am just wondering, where do they find time to scheme such winding plots. Considering the fact that make-up takes most of their time, is the rest of the time sincerely dedicated to hatching plots to back-stab an innocent friend. Don't they have to go to jobs ? Don't they have family to look after ? Don't they come home tired that all they can do is fall asleep in the comfort of their beds ? Don't they have other friends to talk to ? Don't they have household work like cleaning, paying bills or sitting idle reflecting upon days progress ( or lack of it ?)

Why is it the characters (the women) has to either be goodness incarnate or the devil herself. ( No guy is significant enough to be a villain, even if he is, he's just a trivial fellow compared to the women folk.)
DO THE SERIAL WRITERS EVER REALIZE THAT NO NORMAL PERSON FALLS INTO THESE CATEGORIES.
I mean "To err is human" Why is that the heroine have to be so submissive????
Are they meaning to say that "proper" Indian girls lack "SELF-RESPECT" . Why do they portray women to be the slave of the in-laws?

Why can't they just portray a normal house-hold ? A normal house-hold, where people don't scheme , where people don't cry everyday,
Where people fight , get back together, go out , have fun, play with the kids, do small thirututhanams that are harmless, have ego clashes with friends, but at the end of the day forget it all, and enjoy with friends and family.

Most astonishing fact is that , these serials are so popular, that even re-telecast of these serials are profitable. My only say is that, the directors, cast and crew should be responsible for what they are telecasting. Piling loads of misery into serials, having cunning, selfish, insolent, abominable, shameless vengeful characters is not natural. So is having characters that are tolerant , submissive, lacking self respect, ready to shoulder burdens of those who committed crimes against them. Get real guys!!!!
Just don't create de-facto standards for women..

At the end of the day, with such a huuuuge market, they can do things in a better way .
At least start by getting realistic !!!!And portray some real characters.. Don't let down the audience who put you guys in so high a position.
That's my say..

CIAO.

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder

Hi All,

Ever since, i registered in Gostats, (approximately 45 min back) i am suffering from
"Obsessive Compulsive Disorder". I have been clicking the stats button , every few seconds.
Believe it or not, the first twenty + hits have been mine (yep, its only 45 min, i can understand people being incredulous about this :))

Thankfully my story didin't receive any negative feedback :)

Planning to write my next story soon. (No idea how soon is soon :))
I come home totally exhausted , but somehow blogging energises me.
Also lots of people , have started blogging.
Nice to have a peek inside somebody's else thought process.( The same what you are doing right now)
Anyways this post is just because of my "Obsessive Compulsive Disorder".
So pardon me if it sounds a bit silly..

CIAO.

Sunday, April 09, 2006

Climax !!!

Hi All,

Time for the climax. For the story click here .
Thanks for all the wonderful climaxes..

Deepak's climax was realistic. It was a sensible end. Liked it a lot. Its more or less what would have happened in an actual situation.

Thiru's climax was kind of very nice. Kind of a dream sequence. Liked his version too.

Vasanth's climax was very sentimental and touching. Strong family sentiments, family story.
Liked this end too.

Srini's Climax was very good. The language flow, the descriptions and the narration was great. Liked it a lot.

Surprisingly, nobody wrote any super natural ends. Good to see that nobody's driven by superstitions these days :)
Since liked all the climax's don't want to be partial to one. (I know i am diplomatic :)) So choose all their versions as the audience version.

Now the much awaited(????) climax of mine . Here goes...

Suddenly , one day, driven by impulse, Anand decided to give "their" haunted cottage a visit. He was still feeling guilty for not presenting her with the only house she had desired. Deciding to brave odds, he asked Aditi to get ready. Noticing his excited state, Aditi got ready without asking a word.

She had no clue as to what was in store for them ..

When Anand turned his car car into the all familiar ECR route , Aditi was filled with trepidation. What's is he going to do ? Why is he taking this route ? Hasn't he still given up on the cottage?
Why is he taking such a risk ? Surely we can be happy without this cottage !!

She called softly "Anand. where are you taking me ? Don't tell me you are driving upto the run down cottage again.."

Silence was the only answer she received. Even in the cool AC she began to perspire. Why doesn't he say something. Why is he silent . What's has gotten into him ?

Suddenly some hundred yards from the cottage Anand stopped the car, got out..
'Come out dear', 'there's something i have to show you' . totally terrified now, she wailed ,

'Anand do you think its a really good idea. The same watchman might scare us ' 'Do we really need to do this.'

'Relax dear. Hold my hand. We are going for a walk. Just close your eyes till i ask you to open them'

After a short stretch ..'Open your eyes now'

Slowly she opened her eyes. First her reaction, was pure shock, then it was one of wonder, she couldn't believe it. The run down cotage was nowhere to be seen . In its place, stood an elgant & neat cottage, with a garden in front, a white fence surrounding it. The sea was roaring few hundred yards away. It was the most beautiful sight she had seen in a long while. Infact it looked much better than when she had noticed it first, with the fresh paint filling her nostrils.

How did it happen. Noticing her disbelief, Anand started to explain.
'I wanted to gift it to you, the moment you first set you eyes upon this house.But first i had to finish my MBA. Later i wanted to buy this property, when we decided upon the marriage date. But prices were sky rocketing, and lots of potential buyers were keen to buy this property. I knew if i had to pit against all the prospective buyers, i had to use all my cunning. What i couldn't achieve through wealth, i achieved through strategies.'

With a grin he added 'after all i am a MBA grad. I am supposed to be smart' .

'You are smart dear, no doubt about that'. replied Aditi.

The grin deepened into a smile, making Anand look energised.

'So i created a illusion , that this place was haunted. Murugan here, (the old man who had scared them earlier, came out, with a sheepish grin on his face. ) helped me. He warded off buyers who visited this place. So finally when i offered to buy this place, the owner was more than willing to let me buy it. That too at a reasonable price. My only regret is that i had to wait for a long time to get the place fixed . I had to wait several weeks after marriage to get you this. '

His smile turned into a sad , defeated one.

Aditi however , was in high spirits.
Hey forget that. Think of it this way .. You got this planned long before marriage. So actually it was ours, at the time of marriage. Only now we got time to fix it. I feel as though i am the happiest on earth. What's more important is that you love me so much, to go to such an extent for me . Somehow , somewhere som angel has blessed me with you. '


Anand looked at his loving wife(who was almost in tears) , smiled and said,

'Welcome home dear,' and ushered her into the cottage.

So thats the end of my first story guys and girls. Hope you all liked it .

See you later, till then,

CIAO.

Sunday, April 02, 2006

Silver Jubilee !!!!!!

Hi All,

My 25th blog !!!!

My "tryst" with blogging..
It started in June'2005. Initially blogs were just a space for my overflowing thoughts. (yep that's in the header) I started blogging to vent off my frustations in life. It was just my outlet.
I was undergoing a rough phase, and blogs offered me great consolation. Infact I maintained my anonymity, and never made it known, that i'm a blogger.

That was a period during which Murphy's law became true . :)
If anything can go wrong, it will !!!
Though i had everything, it seemed as though everything was slipping through my fingers.

Then came a god sent ANGEL (who happens to be my best friend ), because of whom i started believing in myself. After that, blogging didn't hold any charm , because my reasons for blogging defeated itself.
I was happy. Didn't have the need to blog anymore..

Once i started working, read a couple of blogs of my colleagues. It ignited my passion for writing. It revived the once "cremated" urge to blog. I stopped blogging for my"self" and started blogging for an audience. (Though not many , enough to keep me going ). Started blogging continously, though not on a regular basis.

One of my very good friends remarked to me once,
"your blogs aren't depressing, they are full of life."
Somehow, that made me happy more than anything else ever did, because it reflected the soul inside. :) I was happy to know that i was happy ( Yep, i am that clueless :)) , because my blog is the real ME.
With every single comment in my blog, my happiness grew.

It has now come to state where i am almost addicted to blogging. Nothing calms me more than a single line comment in my blog (multilines too). Even in my worst moods, blogging neutrals the frustations and anger .And now my 25th post.
Hope i live to write my 100th ...

'coz at the end of the day ,
knowing the fact that someone ,somewhere knows you and understands you in the same way you want to be understood , is all that matters !!! (To me atleast )

Thanks guys and girls for making this possible ...
Keep visiting.

CIAO.

Friday, March 31, 2006

My first story

Hi All,

This is my first story . ( Actually the second , the first being in Tamil . Also the earlier attempt never saw the light of the day :) Nobody read that. So this can be called as my first story )

Here goes....

Aditi and Anand are in love.

It all started in the first semester. It was the first day of college, Aditi was a nervous wreck. All her friends had warned her about ragging. Though being a premier institution, her college was renowned for "ragging". She was worried and kept dreaming the worst possible scenarios, that can happen.

All her imagination didn't go in vain. Aditi was a beautiful girl, with graceful walk, big bright eyes, long silky hair, and angelic , captivating face. The moment she stepped into college, a senior gang, noticed her. They called her aside, and started talking to her. They all appeared as cinema villains to the innocent ,naive mind of Aditi. As if her life was a movie, out of the blue came Anand, Their eyes met for an instant , and that instant was enough for Aditi , for she knew instinctively that he was not only her savior but also her future.

Thus started their love story. They had their ups and downs but they held on.
After five years, during which Anand had finished his MBA from IIM-A and Aditi had completed her engineering . Both were settled with great jobs..
They decided to take the next step . They planned to get married. Surprisingly, there were no villainous parents. Both were smart, talented, good looking. Even their parents knew, they could never hope to find a better match.

Anand wanted to gift the perfect house for his beautiful angel. During their long courtship ,on one of the occasions ,on a long drive on the ECR , she had squealed with delight, upon coming across a small, elegant beachside cottage. He had vowed to himself that he would do whatever it takes to present it as their marriage gift.

Now was the perfect time to go buy it. On a auspicious day, just weeks before their marriage they set out, seeking "their" property. When they came to the cottage, they found it deserted.
There was no sign of human inhabitation. All around, wild trees had grown,giving the whole place a desolated feel. Aditi had second thoughts , is this the place she wanted to spend her rest of her life? Surely no. Not such a haunted looking cottage..

Disappointed they were about to turn back, when an old man walked towards them .
He noticed their disappointment in their eyes, and yelled..

"Go away..Kids.. This is not the place for you. Strange things have been happening at night. Windows keep fluttering. I keep hearing a woman wailing all through the night. The place is haunted. Don't come here. She'll seek you. And then , she'll kill you. Go away."

Even in the mid of march , in the blazing heat, they were chilled to the bones. They quickly turned back. Aditi clung to him, as though she might lose him the very next minute if she didn't hold on.. Terrified they made a hasty departure.

They got married.Few weeks of bliss went by. Though they seemed the happiest couple on earth, Aditi could sense something troubling Anand. She could sense the quiet moments of reflection, in his faraway eyes, which upon her inquisitive gaze would turn into a drawling smile, chiding her questioning gaze. Somehow he wasn't his usual self ever since the visit to the haunted cottage. He seemed different , as though he was on the verge of disclosing a grave secret.

Suddenly , one day, driven by impulse, Anand decided to give "their" haunted cottage a visit. He was still feeling guilty for not presenting her with the only house she had desired. Deciding to brave odds, he asked Aditi to get ready. Noticing his excited state, Aditi got ready without asking a word.

She had no clue as to what was in store for them ..


I know how I want to end the story , but I want the audience response. All those who read are welcome to write their own version of the climax. The original climax will be posted in a week depending on the response. Also complying to a request from one of my good friends, will post a second climax, which would be selected from the comments.

Come on guys and girls, write out your version.

Tuesday, March 28, 2006

Value of a woman

When will guys learn to respect a girl. Not for her beauty, but for herself, for her capabilityies, for her abilities, for her mind, for her thoughts, for her spirit ?
When will they ever realise that girls are not mere dolls of affectation, but are sensible beings equal to them in all fields.
When will they learn to appreciate a girl for what she is, when will they learn to welcome her thoughts , ( because its her thoughts , not just a replica of the guys ) When will they realise that , she has a mind of her own. She is capable of all emotions that guys experience. Feeling are universal. Why should she be submissive , jus because few who don't understand that she has a mind of her own, ridicule her, and subject her to submission.
Its nothing short of harassment . mental harassment . to say how a girl should behave with propriety at all times. Isn't it the same for guys ? Why is it that girls should have a check on themselves. Why is that the guys can run loose. Society is too very unfair. I am not suggesting for an instant that i want to break loose, and do what i want. Fortunately, the peple around me, know that i can, but don't do so because of my own restrictions on myself, not anyone else's.
Its jus that , when society imposes restrictions it should for all, irrespective of gender. When will gender bias end ??
a big ??????????? is the only answer i get !!!!

Sunday, March 26, 2006

Thee By En'Core

Hi All,

I went to the release of this album. It was a simple ceremony.. But their music, in a total contrast to them .. Totally professional.. Read about the album review in lazygeek Couldn't resist quoting it here.
"Now a bunch of guys, naming their band as Encore have come out with a Tamil pop album Thee. They sent across an email with a pointer to their music samples. Listening even to the first one, I've to say I'm thoroughly impressed. At first it seemed like an email to get some blog bandwidth but they sure rock. Their title number, Thee has some amazing strings and some superb rhythm programming(notice the aygiri nandhini tune jammed in-between). The music sounded very professional and nothing close to being an amateur troupe. I just glanced down to read the credits and saw Percussion - Sivamani, Bass - Keith Peters. Both, masters in their own areas. And the label of release was Saregama. The singers list had Devan, Malgudi Suba and Chinmayi. Seems like they got the big fishes in the industry for their album. Apart from their title track Thee, I also liked Dhinam Dhinam and Chinmayi's Thaai Polavae(can't sing at a lower pitch than this).
Though one has to listen the entire album before jumping to a conclusion, I loved majority of their samples and am looking forward to the rest. Encore formed by Bharat / Jagdhish / Karthik / Krishna and Katz are trying to revive Tamil Pop. I hope and wish their attempts gets noticed and reaches out to the masses. "
Another one by Suresh Kumar :
The most likeable thing about the album is the way they have beautifully built the layers one over the other in preludes and interludes of the songs. The layers in harmony and nice orchestration make us feel ecstatic when we listen to them. Also they have tried different sounds and fusion and it has worked out well. Summing up, Encore proves that they have a fire within with their debut album “Thee”.

To quote these guys "Life is short; We wanted to make life worthwhile through our music. We have started the first step, but still as Robert Frost's saying goes, "We have miles to go before we sleep"...... mail@theebyencore.com "


I have heard the songs over and over again.. Believe me , its a great effort. Worth every single peeny you speand on this.Wish i had lived upto my own expectations :(
Still i can though :)

CIAO.

Saturday, March 25, 2006

I am happy

Hi All,

I feel good ( tada tada tada tan..)
I feel good ( tada tada tada tan..)
I feel good ( tan tan)
Feel good...

I know I'M not making sense.. but thats me.. whnever i am too happy or too sad( which is most of the time ) i don't make sense .

CIAO

My home Comp's alright !!!!

Hi All,
Now i don't have to look around furtively wondering whether anyone in office wold catch me blogging. Nothing wrong, but still would feel embarrassed if caught . Now bak in home turf !!
Great !!!!! You can expect frequent blogs from now on

CIAO...

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Feels nice to be remembered

Hi All,

Its been long since I posted.. Was not free (read :not busy) . Just not free!!!
I have been thinking about this blog for quite a few days..
About the people who don't matter to us, but who touch with their warmth and honesty.
They are unforgettable people in my life. Though I don't even know their names. They are the kind of people we meet everyday on the roads, nothing extraordinary about them , but people blessed with something which most of us, in this materialistic world have forsaken.
They are kind, attach value to humans. ( I have been with them for utmost 5 minutes) .Yet their aura was so powerful that they really make me wonder..

One is a salesman in a huge textile showroom.(The one that I frequent) The person is atleast 20 years elder to me. Yet he called me Madam .. That hurt. ( Its the same when the security people in my office refer me by the same) Just working in reputed firm , and earning more than these people doesn't qualify me to be treated that way. What sort of world this, which judges a person by their bank balance.. Anyway coming back to this guy, he was so honest. He could have cheated me quoting a price far above the original, and I would have bought the salwar for the same, but he chose not tooo. Lotsa people are honest I agree, but the amount of dedication he showed to his work overwhelmed me.. Before I left I just told him, one day you will start your own shop. He seemed both happy and embarrassed by the remark.
The next time I went to the shop, I was a bit preoccupied and didn't notice his attempts to catch my eye.. Just when I was about to leave the shop, I noticed him and went to him and said HI ..Do you remember me'
He replied 'ungala eppadi madam( no madam please) marakka mudiyum' meaning --how can I forget you' chatted with him for few minutes (showed him the bag he sold me on the previous purchase) Its felt really nice to be remembered by him.

The other person is a road side vendor. We buy groundnut from him. (i.e. my mom used to buy, occasionally I accompanied her .But that was long back. Recently when I went to my old place after a long time , I just came across the vendor. So thought of buying groundnut..
He remembered me. And not just me.. My mom... My brother..He even remembered where my brother studied..I was really surprised (I was really happy).

Both are honest people, who attached great importance to people. They could have been just another person on the road , who doesn't give a damn about anything else.
They just restored my faith in humans.. Its requires greatness to instill faith.
I salute and bow to their greatness.

Till my next post...
CIAO..

Thursday, January 12, 2006

Fear that i can't express the depth of what i feel...

Hi All,

I am writing this in a sober mood.
Part of me crying, part of me jumping out with joy,
Partly in ecstasy , partly in agony...
Too many emotions that can't be defined. I know the cause, i just read something, which is too wonderful , absolutely brilliant, emotionally binding, that tears were the natural course of it..
All other unfortunate souls who cannot read coz i lost it.. lost it forever...
Read a truth unleashed...
Too good that it i feel worhtless to write my own version for the fear of losing the sanctity of what's been written..
Words... how deep, how natural, how powerful..
Is there a sword too sharp to cut like words, or a knife that can pierce through your heart leaving a scar forever and ever..
Felt worthless to read it.. Because i don't deserve to read such pure, untold , submission of self..
Just not worth that much..
Somehow, some angel blessed me with such luck..
Today's the most memorable day in my life cause , though i can't explain the implications of what i read, the significance have to be said... Not to do so, will only trap me in my own grief , agony and ecstasy.
Confusing isn't it. Too feel all the emotions at the same time ... Too have all bundled up, that you can't recognise your own feelings, nor understand the prevalent mood , with the present being of no consequence , a feeling of numbness that doesn't subside, making you confused more than ever. Making you an alien to yourself.. I don't find it odd. It has been a way of life all the time..
Wary of surroundings and place, i neither think nor react, not even aware of what i am doing or supposed to do..
A single article... a single man's greatness, wishing it could have been otherwise ...
But fate... and fear that i have expressed too much...

Without a beginning , and an end i quit this ...

CIAO..