Saturday, November 15, 2008

True strength comes from within

Hi All,

On a whim went to my cousin D's place for dinner. It was truly transformational experience. 
Met D's sister S. She is truly a remarkable woman. She is just two years older than me, yet she is so mature. (Got two kids, aged- 11 and 6), been married for 12 years. 
She recently lost her mother and her husband. Yet she is so strong. The fact that she loved them more than anything else in life was so evident. The way she fondly recalled every single moment of her life with her husband was so touching. Yet she didn't cry. She must been through so much pain, yet she wants to take life to the next level for the sake of her children. I wonder how many can ever be like her, to think of what needs to be done in the face of adversity. I have no words to describe what this phenomenal woman is. I am not old enough to bless you dear, but I hope and pray that for all the pain you have been through, God showers you with great happiness from now on. D's is equally sweet. I am proud to be associated with them. 

The fact that she was so bold in the face of the most adverse situation in her life was so very touching. I salute you S. You are truly a source of energy. I drew so much strength from you. 
If there's anything I can ever do for you, I will gladly do. Relating this to the recent events in my life, I feel really cowardly. After seeing her, I feel God truly has given me the strength to go on. 

Feeling really touched. Good times are really back again. At the least I feel I have the courage to face anything that comes my way from now on. 

CIAO.

Sunday, November 09, 2008

Saved :)

Thank goodness. God saved me :) He has always looked after me and will continue to do so always too. It is great when you feel the invisible hand helping you always. 

Thank you God for saving me. Thank you for being so considerate and not letting harm come my way. Thank you for all the good things and thank you for not letting the bad things continue. 


... lost in melody

Hi All,

Might sound cliched, but I can't help being lost in the sweetness of the voices of Unnikrishnan and Bombay Jayashree. 

All of Unni and Jayashree's songs are truly amazing. Sample this song from Iruvar - Narumugayae. A.R.Rahman has brought the best of both in this particular song. No wonder even after years(!!!) this song still remains one of my favorites. Not the fad type favorite, but the forever favorite type. 

On a side note: Was researching for a project and came across a paper published by my Prof. Naresh Malhotra. It is not surprising and many papers/ projects/ articles have been published by many of the professors who have taught me so far. Still feeling glad when I think about it. I could always say with pretended nonchalance when I pass out of this place - "Oh that prof taught us this course" :) I am really glad to be here despite the horrendous time I have had here. 

Got to get back to the project (and of course to youtube and naruto). 

CIAO. 

Friday, November 07, 2008

First publication

Hi All,

My poem got published :) Well it was published only in the SFA magazine of ISB. Still feeling happy to see my words in print :) Something to cheer in troubled times. 

It is an old poem, Utopia, which I had posted about a year back in the blog. 



Glad again :)

Thank you all.

CIAO.

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Empathy

I am able to emphatize with A. I can see the pain the person is going through and wish I could say, dude, people have been there before and in a far worser state. Don't give a damn. But unfortunately the person is oblivious and is bearing the pain. I wish I could console, but I know any amount of sympathy/ empathy/ from a third person will only add to the person's woes. So I am keeping silent. Wish C had more sense and would at least be more sensitive to the feelings of A. 
But C is also like L. Ditto. Similar. But In the end it doesn't even matter. We are what we are irrespective of what we try to do for others. 

Monday, October 27, 2008

So long and thanks for all the fish

Hi All,

I love to listen to this song when I am happy. Makes me jump from my chair and dance to the tune. 
As the book says, the answer to universe, life and everything is 42 :) What is the question? 
Well that would involve "making" another earth to find the answer as the current earth was demolished as it was blocking the inter galactic pathway. 

I know I am not making any sense, but that in short is the crux of the "Hitch Hiker's Guide to Galaxy". An amazing read and one must definitely try it, at the least to laugh ourselves to death.  
Side note: Really happy today. Got all the courses I had bid for. Sad part: at what cost? - about 1700 points. Sob sob!!! Corporate control mergers and acquisition at 707 points :( 
Can you believe that? :( 

Anyway have to be glad that I got the courses I bid for and I am happyyyyyyyyyy. 

Got to prepare and send a document before 12 Midnight. Getting back to work. 

Before I finish - a very happy diwali to all :)

Till we meet next. 

CIAO.


Thursday, October 23, 2008

It doesn't even matter

Hi All,

Felt like posting the lyrics of linkin park's "It doesn't even matter".

(It starts with)
One thing / I don’t know why
It doesn’t even matter how hard you try
Keep that in mind / I designed this rhyme
To explain in due time
All I know
time is a valuable thing
Watch it fly by as the pendulum swings
Watch it count down to the end of the day
The clock ticks life away
It’s so unreal
Didn’t look out below
Watch the time go right out the window
Trying to hold on / but didn’t even know
Wasted it all just to
Watch you go
I kept everything inside and even though I tried / it all fell apart
What it meant to me / will eventually / be a memory / of a time when I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end
It doesn't even matter
I had to fall
To lose it all
But in the end
It doesn't even matter
One thing / I don’t know why
It doesn’t even matter how hard you try
Keep that in mind / I designed this rhyme
To remind myself how
I tried so hard
In spite of the way you were mocking me
Acting like I was part of your property
Remembering all the times you fought with me
I’m surprised it got so (far)
Things aren’t the way they were before
You wouldn’t even recognize me anymore
Not that you knew me back then
But it all comes back to me
In the end
You kept everything inside and even though I tried / it all fell apart
What it meant to me / will eventually / be a memory / of a time when I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end
It doesn’t even matter
I had to fall
To lose it all
But in the end
It doesn’t even matter
I've put my trust in you
Pushed as far as I can go
For all this
There’s only one thing you should know
I've put my trust in you
Pushed as far as I can go
For all this
There’s only one thing you should know
I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end
It doesn’t even matter
I had to fall
To lose it all
But in the end
It doesn’t even matter

This is the first time I have posted twice in a day. Like this song a lot. Relieves tension - helps vent irritation/ frustation. Best medicine for frustation - listening to "It doesn't even matter" followed by "Kurai ondrum illai" by M.S.Subbulakshmi amma. Really there can be nothing else  (IMHO) better than this combination.

CIAO

I am my competitor

Hi All,

No!!! Please don't get the wrong picture. I am not that conceited. Its just that only two teams were selected from ISB for the IIT-Roorkee Samadhan contest. Guess what? - I am part of both the teams. I am competing against myself. :) 

To be honest, I want one team to win more than the other. I really hope the results would turn in the favor of the team I am favoring, even if it means putting in extra hours of work for making that happen I don't care. I might seem partial and I am too - but can't help being so. (At the least I am truthful about it). 

In fact the irony is that, I had contributed more to the other team and had worked harder/longer on the other executive summary. Yet some things can't be explained and this is one such thing that has no rationale behind it. My fate is intertwined with my life. 

Well that makes the total shortlist count so far as 3. Not bad - not bad at all :)

Have to run to class right now. Will make a post sometime later.

CIAO.

Monday, October 20, 2008

Study groups and group projects

Hi All,

Making this post on a very happy note. Initially I almost thought of dropping out of "marketing services" course, but really glad that I held on to it, despite my intial apprehensions. 

For many reasons.

1) Professor is really good. It is the only class I attend with zero hours of sleep yet end up being awake for the entire session (exception being Negotiation Analysis class - but well I can't really afford to fall asleep during one-one negotiations, so I am discounting that subject). It might also be due to the fact that I sit in the first row right in front of the professor. Forget all the other reasons I am stating - prof is good. Period. 

2) I hadn't formed a study group till the 11th hour (Literally) as I thought I would drop the course and take some other interesting course.  Other groups were already formed and I thought I would end up being an orphaned child. Sob!!! sob!!! Thank goodness R misunderstood that I wanted to form a group for Business Valuation and replied to my panicky mail. I asked whether he had a empty slot in marketing services and he did. Thank God for that.  I found a group.

3) I really feel comfortable with the group. Be it R/RJ/ J/ K/ M. I feel non-threatened. Surprisingly I feel really valued. Just now J made the statement that he is really glad that I am on the team. :) Of course the fact that R & K reinforced his statement made me feel even better. Only thing is that, I have to live up to their expectations and not let them down. The fact that they trust me makes me so very happy, as it is very difficult to build trust and trust if broken - very difficult to repair. 

4) Feel like really contributing to the group - it is a nice group and as diverse as it can get. Good thing is that we will part ways in a month, so hopefully there'll be fewer chances for any disputes to arise.

5) J and R said they'll want to form teams with me in any other course that I am undertaking.
After the last week's episode I guess this is the best-est thing that could have happened to me. Still doesn't change a lot of things (infact changes nothing) about what I want/ need in life. But as I have always maintained "kutti" things in life, make or mar my happiness. 

6) Hmmm really thinking whether I should write a sixth point. 

So thats it for now folks. hope to see you all again real soon. 

Till we meet next. 

CIAO.

Friday, October 17, 2008

Rise Up - Yves Larock

Hi All,

Considering the fact that the number of parties have been on the rise at ISB, it might seem no wonder that I have become dance addicted of late. I never knew I had the passion for dancing and it surprises me the most that I do cherish a secret love for dancing!!!

Like everything else in my life - here goes my history of dancing

It was during my 7th standard. We were doing a dasavatharam dance - drama and I was choosen to be one of the dancers. After practising for weeks, one fine day during a rehearsal session my Principal came to over to see how the performance was shaping up. Her only comment about me after watching the dance was - "She is too thin, she will not be able to carry the costume". I was so irritated at her, angry at myself for being thin and disappointed most of all. All my friends knew that I would be dancing and to face their pity was something I could not bear to think about or tolerate. 

After that incident I refrained from dancing. Anytime they wanted hordes of dancers to fill the stage I would be picked to participate, else I was mostly left behind. Given these chain of events I never tried to dance and shied away everytime someone asked me to, either in marriages or otherwise. (College bus trips were an exception - nobody dared comment on my style/ lack of it :) ) 

During my first party at ISB was very shocked to see that people dress up, drink and dance. (Never been to a pub). Got used to seeing people dancing and partying in a few days time (Had three parties during the first week at ISB - courtesy Co2008). I shied away as usual and whenever people asked me to join their group for dancing - politely declined mumbling that I wouldn't want to step on someone's shoes/ toes. 

The credit goes to Sindhura's party for initiating the will of fire to dance- that was the time when I realised that I loved jumping around even if I didn't look graceful and got my steps wrong. But the real turning point was the song "rise up". This song is very special to me for many reasons, reasons - unstated and would never ever forget this song in my entire life. This was/is "THE" song that made/ makes me develop the passion/love/whatever for dancing. No party is fulfilling unless they play this particular number. 

So thats how my addiction to dancing started. Now there's the dandiya festival tomorrow, we are supposed to dress up in traditional attire (hurray :) :) ) and dandiya dance the night away. Really glad/excited about it. Eagerly waiting for tomorrow. 

So this makes third time in a row. Have been posting something everyday for the past three days. hurray!!! hurray!!! Hurray !!!

Got to get back to my books now. 

Till the next time.

CIAO.


Wednesday, October 15, 2008

God exists

Hi all,

Recently been writing/thinking a lot about God. Mind's inclined towards God right now. 
Don't know why and don't care why. Finding inner peace when thoughts turn toward God.

CIAO.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Maanasa Sancharare

Hi All,

Recently I started listening to perumal songs, its been really long since I listened to/ learnt any "perumal" songs, and the change is really welcome. 

Few of the songs I keep listening to everyday(thanks to youtube)
Shri Venteswara Suprabatham
Shri Ganesh Suprabatham
Baja Govindham
Maanasa Sancharare
Sriman Narayana
Kurai ondrum illai by MS Subbulakshmi amma - she's really great.
Bhramamokate
Vara leela gana lola - I learnt this song while at school, I was trying to remember it for really long, the only part I remembered about it was that it is a beautiful song by Unni Krishnan. 

Suddenly at 5 AM in the morning remembered the name of the song - immediately googled and found the link in youtube.com. Felt really happy as this song was eluding me for quite sometime now. The world seems a happier place to live in when the answer to something that has been eluding one for so long suddenly pops in to the head. Literally amazing feeling. 

Work's as usual at ISB. Ever since elective terms started feeling little lost. Don't have the familiarity of the class, comfort of the people whom I know and worse have to form groups in every elective that I am taking. It is a really difficult task and thank goodness I found groups in three of the four subjects that I am taking. I am not sure about the fourth, will have to wait and watch. Leaving it to God as he knows best what to do and what not to do. I am just doing my duty which is what is essential. 

Missing amma, prabhu, prasan, padmasree, ishan (my dearest dearest darling), appa, paati, chitthi and all my friends. Feels as though I have turned over a new leaf and become a completely different person, the person I used to be once upon a time, very long time ago. Mother's are GOD's greatest creation. I know amma will/can never read this, but "mu" I love you. I want to keep you happy all through your life in every way possible. 

Forcing myself to blog these days as it keeps me going/ happy. In the long run it will become an habit again :) (Or hoping it will at the least)

Till we meet next

CIAO.

P.S. In case you were wondering why the title reads "Maanasa Sancharare" - that was the song I was listening to when I started making this post :)

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Thunderbird

Hi All,

Just finished the write- up for Thunderbird sustainable innovation summit contest. Phew!!!
Really exhausted by the amount of time/ effort/energy I ended up spending on it. I could have been doing a zillion other things but yeah have to be content that I did finish something. 

Part of me wishing that we get selected for the next round (considering the amount of effort I put on this) and part of me wishing "enough is enough". No more work on sustainable development. 

Have to read 7 chapters + 2 cases + 3 sets of lecture slides as pre-reads for tomorrow's lectures. Gosh I would be glad if I complete at least one subject. Few other things are pending as well. Wish I had slept last night, because this is going to be a long night :( (As every other night is at ISB) . Nothing really new, but still hoping I could get back the four days of blissful sleep I caught up on at home during this term break. 

Got to go to wrap Thunderbird document. 

I hope I make frequent posts from now on.

CIAO.