Tuesday, March 28, 2006

Value of a woman

When will guys learn to respect a girl. Not for her beauty, but for herself, for her capabilityies, for her abilities, for her mind, for her thoughts, for her spirit ?
When will they ever realise that girls are not mere dolls of affectation, but are sensible beings equal to them in all fields.
When will they learn to appreciate a girl for what she is, when will they learn to welcome her thoughts , ( because its her thoughts , not just a replica of the guys ) When will they realise that , she has a mind of her own. She is capable of all emotions that guys experience. Feeling are universal. Why should she be submissive , jus because few who don't understand that she has a mind of her own, ridicule her, and subject her to submission.
Its nothing short of harassment . mental harassment . to say how a girl should behave with propriety at all times. Isn't it the same for guys ? Why is it that girls should have a check on themselves. Why is that the guys can run loose. Society is too very unfair. I am not suggesting for an instant that i want to break loose, and do what i want. Fortunately, the peple around me, know that i can, but don't do so because of my own restrictions on myself, not anyone else's.
Its jus that , when society imposes restrictions it should for all, irrespective of gender. When will gender bias end ??
a big ??????????? is the only answer i get !!!!


vasanth said...

In our society females are respected and given freedom when it comes to educated people… but when it comes to some people with a different mindset (because of our culture) their freedom is reduced to a certain extend but its not completely removed… and in our society every one cannot do anything… I mean it’s not only girls who have restrictions but it’s also guys who have restriction… must be proud to be is such a society… but I do accept that there are some pitfalls

Anonymous said...


First of all I wud like to say s dat, it s d environment n d society which play a major role in shaping a person, influencing his or her thoughts n actions to a large extent.. So to be on d safer side, not to get affected n hurt, u change urself.. U try to learn ppl first n dat shud reflect in ur actions.. If he or she, whose actions or words hurt u, n dat person happens to be close to u, then u have every right to expresss ur view, otherwise jus try followin d things i mentioned few lines above..

By d way its me, Sesh

Srini said...

Very true. And it is going to take a long time before they (we) learn to respect girls. Things have improved over time, and will definitely still improve.

Not that I'm acting like a good boy suddenly. Probably u might have sniffed this, on 'me' going the 'we' way after the chat on Rapunzel issue.

Also sesh has done some better say with his ideas. But something that still keeps me puzzling is, what smalltalk could have given u such an emotional outburst ?

Prathiba said...

@ Vasanth,

Thanks for the comment. Yep i do respect our culture,in more ways than you could imagine. But culture doesn't inhibit girls, its the so-called "protectors" of culture who do.Nice to know that even guys have restrictions. (Though i haven't heard of any :))

Prathiba said...

@ Sesh,

Yes da, society does mould a person, but shouldn't an individual act on his own. You are right, the only point i wanted to convey is being individual is common to both guys and girls. :)

Prathiba said...

@ Srini,

Hats off to you for accpting thr truth . I am really glad :)
Nothing sparked this outburst, these questions have been brewing inside for a long time. I might sound a bit too strong :)

vasanth said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
vasanth said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Ashutosh Inamdar said...

The views mentioned by you are absolutely appealing....
But in practical terms it is difficult for changing the attitude of the entire society towards the entire Womanhood...Especially when it comes to her feelings..
I strongly support u when u said tat" Its not merely the beauty of a woman tat shud b appreciated,but also her intelligence"...
A munber of times when a Female gets an appreciation ppl never give the credit to her brilliance or her Wit...But instead point towards her External Beauty...
Well Nice blog..hope more n more ppl read this reality.

Anonymous said...

Hi prathiba,
I think this is the first time i am going thru ur blog... Ur statments r very much true. Excellent in fact!!Y this common term soceity? Most of the restrictions are due to guys only. They themselves lay rules for how a girl should be and comment that they wont even respect or consider her if she behaves in her own way.(though nothing in the wrong sense) They also say that those are mere expectations towards the girls.The exact phrase they use is("ponnave madhikkaradhu illa")- if the gal does not meet their xpectation. Also i have come across this term even in "The-Week" magazine published few months before.

Generally guys (most of them) wont even consider that gals do have feelings and equal expectations towards guys. When they do not meet our expectation and if they are questioned about that the answer will be "Pasanganna appadi thaan iruppanga".How execellently and brilliantly they are framing indirect rules!!

Really wondering...!!!
But I also get the same answer tat u got. !!!!!!!????

Prathiba said...

@ Ashutosh,

Thanks for the comment.To be honest, didn't expect so many comments/replies to my blog. Feeling glad about it.
Also i do agree with you, i don't expect society to change. But atleast if few people "realise" that a change is "required" then maybe decades later(!!!) the change will happen ;)

Prathiba said...

Hey Anonymous

Really nice to see your comment. Though i have to say that, its not only the guys who are responsible, even girls are too. They can't stand/accept a popular and outspoken girl. Any girl who speaks out is "branded" Heights of injustice actually. When a girl can't accept another girl, difficult for guys to do so :)
But i am happy that thre's someone else who shares the same view :)

btw welcome to my blog :)

Rangasayee said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Rangasayee said...

we have debated on this topic many times, and i must say i agree to most of it. what i do not agree with is when you say the women folk and men are equal in all fields. thats just not the case. im not saying men are superior, the converse of my statement also holds. to sum up, people have their own identity and to a certain extent it is driven by gender!

Prathiba said...

@ Rangasayee

Nice to know you frequent my blog :) Yep i agree with you, woman can't do certain things (weight-lifting, rough work ) because of reasons like body constitution. But when it comes to the mind , and the spirit and emotions, women are equal (if not better) Thanks for the comment

Rangasayee said...

again, i seem to disagree...i did not refer to body constitution; that would be stupid to do! it is a statistically proven fact that women are better in rote learning and men better with applications. you can probably think of many more examples like this.

vigneshkumar said...

Hellloooo prathi...
Its gud tat u have taken that simple, funny discussion to such an extent.. which shows ur sensitiveness to such things.. And we dint have anything in our minds or thoughts when we wer bullyin u on tat day, but still i wont be makin such mistake anymore.. tata.. :)

Prathiba said...

@ Rngasayee,

One small correction. Women are poor at route learning..


Thanks for the comment. As i said earlier in the dcomments section, this outburst was brewing inside for a long time. I would have written about this anyways :)
Keep visiting

Vasudevan Deepak Kumar said...


The true Indian nation salutes womanhood to the core. Succinct tangible evidences of these can be found in the ways people have named rivers of India. It is also said that Shiva is no better unless Shakthi is with him.

I strongly support your comments "Why should she be submissive ,". This is one perspective where girls have to build strong strategies to manage shows elegantly. They should need to turn direction of the blows towards thier opponents and make them run pillar to post.

Days are bygone where woman were treated like slaves and there is a tamil proverb "Aduppodhum Pengalukku, Padippedharku". We need to thank Kavimani and Bharathi for thier respectively encouraging poems "Mangayaraga Pirappadharke Nalla Maadhavam Seidhida Vendumamma" and "Pattangal Alwadhum Sattangal Seivathum Parinil Pengal Vandhom".

I would rather say that instead of lamenting and recalling only the encouraging words, we need to implement these in practice. And there are role models for us who have showed us the way:

1) Kalpana Chawla

2) Puratchi Thalaivi Dr. J Jayalalitha -- Everyone knows inspite of so much oppositions, she has done a commendable achievement and made Tamil Nadu to claim an enviable position among the various countries and states in the world.
3) Mother Therasa

I don't think nothing is impossible to conquer. Even when you say impossible, as I have observed in one forum as a member shared his thought, the string literal impossible itself induces confidence in us and says I M POSSIBLE (I am Possible).

All the comments and criticisms by the guys are purely due to bad portrayal by the media. We can not straighten a dog's tail. We should just learn to ignore it. The salient example of this, we can see in the examination results of X and XII. These guys 'sight' at girls (colloquially called 'kadalai') and welcome 'arrears', preparing themselves for the September Improvement examinations, whilst girls put thier heart-and-soul into the examinations and taste state and district toppings.